Happy New Year!!!!

May everyone find the
peace, love and happiness
they deserve.

I was such a slug today. I slept through three phone calls and finally rolled out of bed around 12:30. At which point I moved my lazy butt to the sofa where I slept until 3:30, sleeping through several more phone calls. I got up at 3:30 to pee, thinking I would move back to bed and take a nap, when I finally checked my messages. One was from my friend W.C. reminding me that we had plans at 4:30. Whoops. I called him back, left a message that I would be there and took the fastest shower ever. By 3:45 I was on the subway headed downtown. I got to our arranged meeting spot at 4:27. Not bad if you ask me.

At around 7:30 I stopped by the Gay and Lesbian Center because I had to go to the bathroom and it's the one place in the Village you can go without "being a customer." While I was there I saw A.L. If you remember he's the one who drove cross country with me and then stopped speaking to me after I wouldn't date him. I don't know what got into me, perhaps it was the holidays, or I was in a good mood, or whatever, but I approached him put my arm around him and told him that at some point I would really like to talk about what happened and what's going on. You would have thought I touched him with anthrax. He jumped, pushed my arms away and then screamed at me. "I don't want to talk to you, there's nothing to say. I never want to talk to you again!," and then ran out of the Center.

I was taken aback and pissed off to say the least. I didn't even know what to say. Luckily my friend W.C. witnessed the whole thing and we chatted about it for a moment. It's only my opinion but A.L. has completely blown this "thing" out of proportion. We never dated, have never been on a date, and never even came close to it. I know I was firm when I finally told him no, but he forced me into that position. He acts as if we were in a 10 year relationship and just found out the whole thing was a fraud and that I had been cheating on him the whole time. After I calmed down, I realized it was not anger I felt for him, but pity. It's sad that a 55 year old man would attach himself to someone unattainable and then hold them responsible for it. It's also sad that he's living his life in such a place of resentment and anger. It's not a good place to be. In fact on the way home tonight, it made me realize that I needed to take a look at the anger I feel toward D.L.C. and maybe find some closure in that.

That's it for tonight. Except that C.Z. my roommate and I think we have two baby snails growing on the outside of our bath tub. They are too small to tell but they kind of look like they might be. We don't know if we should let them grow or get rid of them.

I got a new cell phone today. Actually I got it yesterday and charged it but finally activated it tonight. My old phone had a crack in the screen and I was afraid it was going to die. Luckily it was time to renew my contract so I got the new phone for free.

I got home tonight to exclamations of joy from my roommate. Seems Santa came to visit today. Or at least all the things he ordered from the Internet using gift cards from Christmas came today. He got a new bathrobe from L.L. Bean, a new cell phone from Verizon, and the special prize...a new Ipod. He's been in and out of his room all night putting Cd's into his computer to download the music on to his Ipod.

As he was showing me his new phone I realized we had bought the same one. I joked that eventually he'll take my phone to work with him and I'll take his phone to work with me. I actually think I am going to go by a case tomorrow so that I don't break this screen in the first week. So C.Z. with his phone and me with my phone spent about 2 hours in the living room checking out new ring tones for our friends. He's never had special ring tones and I've had a few but thought with the occasion of the phone I should find some more.

Here are 5 of the ring tones I have chosen for 5 of my friends.

1. M.L. Theme from Greatest American Hero
2. T.M. 1812 Overture
3. A.N. Stand By Your Man
4. W.C. The Internet is for Porn
5. Mom. Back Where I Come From

What ring tones do you have on your phone for your friends?

There was a snail in my shower tonight. My roommate nor I had noticed it today when we showered. It was about 2 feet up the wall of the shower, which I have to assume took a while. We don't say moving at a snail's pace for nothing. It was just bizarre. My roommate actually thought I was trying to play a practical joke, but I assured him I wasn't. He was gracious enough to pull it off the wall. I then took it outside, hoping that it would live. Here's a couple of pictures.

Well I thought I would post some pictures but Blogger's being a shit again. Does anyone know why I would be unable to post pictures to my account?

A couple of weeks ago, Daniel wrote a post in defense of Sear's decision to advertise on Logo, the gay channel. Part of the post was a request to go to the American Family Association website and instead of doing as they asked write positive letter to Sears. I thought it was the least that I could do, and so I did it. When I hit the send button to forward the email, I was asked for basic contact information. Things like my name, city, and email address. I gave them the information and my email was sent.

I knew a few moments later that I had been registered to receive email notifications from AFA, but I didn't think much about it. Today I got my first email. It's a thank you email for supporting their boycott against Ford for supporting the gay agenda. Here's the body of the email.

December 27, 2006

Please help us get this information into the hands of as many people as possible by forwarding it to your entire email list of family and friends.

New: Update on Ford Boycott

Loses sales ... begins supporting another homosexual magazine ... refuses to stay neutral ... sponsors 'Two and a Half Men' ... urges support of homosexual marriage, stem cell research, and abortion

Dear Maddog,

The boycott of Ford Motor Company is beginning to take effect. In November, Ford sales were down 9.7%. General Motors showed a 6.1% increase during the same month while Chrysler sales were up 4.7%. In seven of the nine months since AFA began the boycott, because of the motor company's support for the homosexual agenda - including homosexual marriage, Ford's sales have gone down compared to a year ago.

Ford has long supported the homosexual magazine, The Advocate. Now, Ford has expanded their promotion of homosexual publications by supporting the homosexual publication Out through advertising.

Wal-Mart recently announced they would no longer support or oppose controversial issues. Ford originally made a similar pledge to AFA but reneged when a small group of homosexual leaders demanded retraction, despite the fact that not a single homosexual group has publicly supported Ford.

Ford was a sponsor of a recent episode of CBS's program "Two and a Half Men" in which actor Charlie Sheen's character mocked Christ, Christmas and Christians by singing a sordid sex song to the tune of "Joy To The World."

During the recent elections, Ford pointed their employees to a radical left wing online voter guide for information on how to vote. The website that contained the guide urged votes against constitutional amendments banning homosexual marriage, for stem cell research in Missouri and against an amendment banning abortion in South Dakota.

Take Action

1. If you have not already done so, click here to sign the Boycott Ford Pledge. More than 625,000 have already signed the pledge. For a history of the boycott, visit www.BoycottFord.com.

2. Click here to send an email to new Ford CEO Alan R. Mulally letting him know you are participating in the boycott.

3. Forward this email to your friends and family who may not be aware of Ford's support for the homosexual agenda.

4. Click here to print and distribute the Boycott Ford Petition.

If you think our efforts are worthy, would you please support us with a small gift? Thank you for caring enough to get involved.

Sincerely,

Donald E. Wildmon, Founder and Chairman
American Family Association

P.S. Please forward this e-mail message to your family and friends!

I am doing as they ask. I am forwarding this to as many people as I can through my blog. You know what to do. Go to the AFA's website and send Ford a message praising them for the courage to support the "gay agenda." Then provide the information requested so that you can be kept up-to-date as to what's being done against us.

If they only knew.

Merry Christmas from NYC. I hope that everyone has the most wonderul holiday ever.

I had a beautiful Christmas photo to accompany my post, but Blogger is being difficult.

Have a great day all the same.

Because stealing at Christmas is so much fun, I helped myself to a meme over at Spo-Reflections who had stolen it earlier in the day. I promise to return it when I am finished.


1. What do you hate most about Christmas? The tourists in NYC. There are about 50 million more people in the city right now than normal. In two weeks the place will be a ghost town.

2. What is your least favorite piece of Christmas music?
Here we come a Wassailing....what the fuck is wassailing? Does anyone know?

3. Your least favorite Christmas decoration?
The Christmas balls that are plastic covered in colored thread. I HATE them. Buy glass balls. The don't cost any more and I like them better. And it is all about me, isn't it?

4. Your least favorite Christmas treat?
I HATE egg-nog. Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Bourbon Balls on the other hand....Yum! Yum! Yum!

5. What traditional Christmas food OTHER THAN FRUITCAKE (too easy) is best sent down the garbage disposal?
My mother's jam cake. Everyone loves it, but I have always hated it. I like the caramel icing but hate the cake.

6. Which animated Christmas TV special leaves you wanting to rip the wallpaper off of the walls?
Mr. Magoo's Christmas Carol. I never liked any of the Magoo cartoons, especially the Christmas Carol.

7. What was you least favorite Christmas gift ever?
My brother gave me two LARGE screwdrivers one year. And that was all. I did a double take and said thank you. I don't know what he was thinking. I still have them, but they are too big to use for anything.

8. What is your least favorite Christmas activity?
Undecorating. I love putting up the tree. I HATE taking it down. I'm really hoping that my roommate will lead the charge in doing this.

9. Who on your Christmas gift list is the hardest to shop for?
My mother. When we were children she would say she wanted, "just for you kids to be good."
As an adult, "just for you to come home." I can't wrap that up and put it under the tree, which leaves me guessing and I never know what to get her.

10. How would you spend this time of year if you were not caught up in all of the holiday madness?
This year to save money I decided to not go home. It was going to cost almost 800 bucks for a ticket in to Lexington and if I go two weeks later it's half that. So I am going two weeks later. So this year, I am going to order Chinese delivery and curl up on the couch and watch the Hallmark channel all day. The have terribly sappy movies that you hate to admit you like. And if I get really lonely I might venture out to see a movie. But probably not. I can hardly wait.

Tonight while channel surfing I happened upon Scrooge, the musical of A Christmas Carol starring Albert Finney. It's been forever since I had thought about that show. At one time it was near and dear to my heart. In 1984 and 1985 I played the Ghost of Christmas Present in a stage version of Scrooge. It was a great part. I was only on stage for about 15 minutes but it was fun. My costume, just like in the movie, was a big green dress. I looked awesome. I also got to sing the song "I Like Life", which has a wonderful message. It's all about appreciating life. I don't have video of me singing this song but I did find the video from the movie. Enjoy.

This is my all time favorite Christmas recording. I still feel warm and fuzzy when I hear it.

Tonight is night 6 of Hanukkah. It has made me think of some interesting stories from my past.

Many years ago I arrived home for Christmas. We did the normal family activities including opening gifts on Christmas morning. As my brother began handing out the packages I noticed a number of them were wrapped in blue paper. As my pile began to grow, I noticed the blue paper was Hanukkah paper, so I gently asked my mom about it. She said that she had gotten it on sale at the Dollar Store and thought it was pretty. I didn't have the heart to tell her it wasn't Christmas paper.

I'm not sure she would have known what Hanukkah is. I grew up in Kentucky and didn't meet my first Jewish person until I moved to Atlanta in 1987. It's not that there was prejudice against Jews, or people didn't like them, it's just there weren't any, at least not in my school.

In 1987 while living in Atlanta I worked as a waiter at Bennigan's Restaurant at Lenox Mall. It was my first time waiting tables and it was the beginning of my coming out of the closet. That Christmas my new friend S.W. (we are friends to this day) hosted a Jewish Christmas party. I was confused. I was educated enough to know that Jews don't celebrate Christmas so I wasn't sure what the deal was. I finally cornered S.W. to ask her. It turns out her roommate celebrated Christmas and although S.W. was Jewish she had always had a Christmas tree. It was a long story but she explained the reasons.

I said thank you and then kissed her since we were standing under the mistletoe. I came out of the closet the next day. But S.W. was the beginning of many wonderful Jewish people that I have met. Of course she's the only one who celebrates Christmas.

I'm very tipsy. I met up with my friend T.O. and his ex-girlfriend D. I have been drinking for about 4 hours and have had one too many Maker's Mark and Diet Cokes. So I thought I would use the excuse of being drunk as a reason to get away from Christmas and steal the sex meme from Larry.

Here goes....

1. Can you count all the sexual partners you've ever had on two hands? When I was 18 I couldn't count all my sex partners. I have had my slutty phase but it's something I am working on even as we speak.
2. When did you have your first sexual experience? I was 16.
3. Do you like boys or girls? Boys.
4. Have you ever had a threesome? Yes, but why limit yourself to just three.
5. How old were you when you first touched yourself? I was about 10 or 11. But I wasn't able to achieve an orgasm until about 12.
6. Have you ever dreamed about having sex with a teacher? Yes. But I think it was because by the time I dreamt it I had already had sex with him.
7. Have you ever dreamed about having sex with an animal? I can honestly say, no.
8. Do you like toys in bed? Depends on the toy.
9. Do you like to be spanked? It's happened but I don't like it. Wouldn't happen again.
10. Does size matter? I'm not ashamed to say I like big dicks but I wouldn't not go out with someone, date them, or fall in love with them based on the their size.
11. Who was your first crush? Doug Herald. Every girl in my school had a crush on him and I have to admit I loved him too.
12. Do you enjoy oral sex? It's my favorite.
13. Have you ever had anal sex? Yes.
14. Did you enjoy the experience? Yes.
15. Do you shave your private area? Not currently, but I have.
16. Do you have wet dreams often? I've had one wet dream in my life and it was on Thanksgiving afternoon and I was asleep in my aunt's bed. Damn was I embarrassed.
17. Have you ever been tied up while having sex? Yes, but I didn't like it.
18. Have you ever tied someone up while having sex? Yes, I liked that more, but not enough to seek it out.
19. Do you believe bisexuality is real? I'm quite sure it exists.
20. If you could sleep with a celebrity legitimately, who would it be? The problem I have is I know most of the celebrities that I am attracted to smoke and it's the deal breaker for me. But if they could give up smoking for a day or two....Jake Gyllenhaal, Mike Piazza, and there will always be a fondness for Brad Pitt even though he cheated on Jennifer.

Now that I have thoroughly embarrassed myself. I am going to bed.

My roommate and I have used the Christmas music channel on our cable to entertain ourselves over the past couple of weeks. While we listen the channel provides useless Christmas trivia, so I thought that was a good idea for a post. Useless Christmas trivia. So here you go.

1. The story of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" was inspired by the tale of "The Ugly Duckling."
2. In Russia, Santa is known as Ded Moroz (Grandfather Frost).
3. The first President to decorate an official White House Christmas tree was Franklin Pierce.
4. Mexicans call the poinsettia "Flower of the Holy Night."
5. "Twas a Night Before Christmas," written by Clement Moore in 1823, was originally known as "A Visit From St. Nicholas."
6. Jesus wasn't born on December 25, and estimates of the year of Christ's birth range from about 14 years B.C. to as late as 23 A.D.
7. More than three billion Christmas cards are sent each year in the United States.
8. Super Bowl Sunday ranks as the third-largest occasion, behind Christmas and Thanksgiving, for Americans to consume food, according to the NFL.
9. One in three American men say they wait until Christmas Eve to finish their holiday shopping.
10. In America, children put stockings out at Christmas time. The Dutch use shoes.
11. "Rudolph" was created by copywriter Robert L. May as part of a holiday promotion for Montgomery Ward in 1939. Rudolph's story was inspired, at least in part, by the story "The Ugly Duckling." Other names considered for Rudolph were Rollo and Reginald.
12. The first charity Christmas card was produced by UNICEF in 1949.
13. The Bible doesn't say Mary and Joseph made their trip to Bethlehem on a donkey.
14. The name of the horse in the timeless holiday song "Jingle Bells" is Bobtail. Hence the line "bells on Bobtail ring, making spirits bright."
15. Mistletoe got its start as a holiday tradition because of its association with Frigga, the Scandinavian goddess of love.
16. To Christians, holly berries symbolize Christ's blood and the pointed holly leaves represent the thorns in his crown.
17. Poinsettias are the most popular Christmas plant and are the number one flowering potted plant in the United States.
18. The practice of putting a lump of coal in the stockings of naughty children originated in Italy.
19. In the Bible, it doesn't say there were three Wise Men.
20. The reindeer's name is Donder, not Donner.
21. It takes an average of seven years to grow a Christmas tree of average retail sale height (six feet).
22. Fifty-six percent of Americans say they sing Christmas carols to their pets.
23. In the 1966 "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" TV special, the person singing the theme song is Thurl Ravenscroft, the voice of Tony the Tiger of Kellogg's fame.
24. The top three Christmas trees in terms of sales are Balsam fir, Douglas fir and Fraser fir.
25. Experts agree that Twisted Billboards is the best Christmas stocking-stuffer ever. And we're not just saying that because we wrote it.
26. If you received all the gifts in the song, "The Twelve Days of Christmas," you'd get 364 presents.
27. The first American Christmas carol was written in 1649 by a minister named John de Brebeur. The song was "Jesus is Born."
28. Frosty's last words were, "Merry Christmas to all, to all a good night!"
29. Due to the way time zones work, Santa actually has 31 hours to deliver his gifts.
30. In Italy, it isn't Santa who delivers gifts to children, it's a kindly witch called La Befana.
31. Despite what many people believe, poinsettia plants aren't poisonous to humans.
32. In 1836, Alabama was the first state to recognize Christmas as an official holiday.
33. The song lyric is "God rest ye merry, gentlemen," not "God rest ye, merry gentlemen."
34. Christmas pudding originates from an old Celtic dish called frumenty.
35. In Greek legend, creatures called Kallikantzaroi play troublesome pranks at Christmas time. To get rid of them, the legend holds that one should burn either an old shoe or salt.
36. Hallmark introduced its first Christmas cards in 1915, five years after the company was founded.
37. About 31% of all diamond purchases are made during the Christmas season.
38. Most artificial Christmas trees are manufactured in Korea, Taiwan or Hong Kong.
39. For every real Christmas tree harvested, two to three seedlings are planted to replace it.
40. Despite what many think, the day after Thanksgiving, called "Black Friday," isn't the busiest shopping day of the year. The Friday and Saturday before Christmas are the two busiest shopping days of the year.
41. In France, Christmas is called "Noel." Noel comes from the French phrase "les bonnes nouvelles," meaning "the good news."
42. The string on Animal Crackers boxes were designed so the boxes could be hung on a Christmas trees.
43. In Hawaii, Santa is called Kanakaloka.
44. The biggest-selling Christmas single of all time is Bing Crosby's, "White Christmas."
45. Before he picked the name Tiny Tim for "A Christmas Carol," Charles Dickens also considered using Little Larry, Puny Pete and Small Sam.
46. Oregon is the leading producer of Christmas trees.
47. Candy canes began as straight white sticks of sugar candy used to decorated the Christmas trees. A choirmaster at Cologne Cathedral had the idea to bend the ends to resemble a shepherd's crook. The treats were passed out during services to keep the children quiet. Candy canes got their red stripes much later.
48. Christmas Island, in the Indian Ocean, was formerly called Kiritimati.
49. There are towns named Santa Claus in Arizona and Indiana, one named Noel in Missouri, and towns named Christmas in Arizona and Florida.
50. Fifty-three percent of Americans claim they'll "re-gift" this Christmas.
51. On average, about 2,000 Christmas trees are planted per acre.
52. At one point, tinsel was banned by the government because it contained lead. Now it's made of plastic.
53. Christmas comes from Old English, "Cristes maesse" or "Mass of Christ."
54. A traditional Christmas dinner in early England was the head of a pig prepared with mustard.
55. "White Christmas," released in 1954, starring Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye, was the first movie to be made in Vista Vision.
56. The holiday classic, "It's A Wonderful Life," was originally a box office flop.
57. The real Santa Claus was born in 280 A.D. as Nicholas. He commonly wore a red and white Bishop's robe.
58. "Xmas" is considered by some to be a disrespectful abbreviation. But the Old English word for Christmas begins with X. The Greek word for "Christ," from which the English is derived, begins with the Greek letter chi, or X. So, X is an appropriate abbreviation for Christ.
59. The first electric Christmas tree lights were telephone switchboard lights.
60. About 400,000 people get sick each year from consuming tainted Christmas leftovers.
61. In 1907, Oklahoma became the last U.S. state to make Christmas a legal holiday.
62. America's official national Christmas tree grows in California's King's Canyon National Park. The tree is a giant sequoia standing more than 300 feet high, and it's called the "General Grant Tree."
63. Christmas trees are edible. Many parts of pines, spruces and firs can be eaten.
64. According to the laws of the time, Joseph could have had Mary stoned to death for becoming pregnant.
65. "Hot Cockles" was a popular game at Christmas in medieval times. In the game, players took turns striking a blindfolded player, who had to guess the name of the person delivering each blow.
66. Toys for Tots held its first toy drive in 1947.
67. Boris Karloff was the voice of the Grinch in the animated classic, "How the Grinch Stole Christmas."
68. During the Christmas shopping season, Visa cards alone are used an average of 5,340 times every minute in the US
69. According to a recent survey, seven out of 10 dogs in Great Britain get Christmas gifts from their owners.
70. "Wassail" comes from the Old Norse term, "ves heill," meaning "to be of good health." This evolved into the popular holiday tradition of visiting neighbors on Christmas Eve and drinking to their health.
71. The average American household will send out 28 Christmas cards each year, and will receive the same number in return.
72. Boxing Day, celebrated in Canada, has nothing to do with fighting. It refers to the custom of giving gift boxes to employees the day after Christmas. Originally, it was the day Christmas presents were given in England.
73. Jesus Christ was born in a cave, not in a stable.
74. The first Christmas card was made in England on December 9, 1842.
75. The ancient Druids believed the sparks from a burning log carried wishes for a prosperous New Year to the gods, hence the tradition of yule logs.
76. According to the National Christmas Tree Association, Americans buy 37.1 million real Christmas trees each year.
77. Charles Dickens wrote several Christmas stories after "A Christmas Carol," one each year, in fact, but none could match the success of the original.
78. The Julbock is a common Christmas decoration in Sweden. It's a small figurine of a goat made from straw.
79. In Sweden, the "tomte" is a Christmas gnome.
80. According to "How the Grinch Stole Christmas," the Grinch was so mean because his heart was two sizes too small.
81. There are about 5,000 "choose and cut" Christmas tree farms in the U.S.
82. St. Nicholas is the patron saint of children, scholars, merchants, sailors and women without dowries.

Today was one of the best days I've had in a long time. I got up early, I was productive, I got my entire list of things accomplished, had my friends M.G. and S.H. over for dinner, cleaned up and am now blogging. Damn near perfect if you ask me.

I got up early to start dinner. I don't know if I have mentioned it before but I don't cook. I don't know how, I don't enjoy it, therefore I don't do it. So inviting anyone over for dinner is a bit daunting. My usual fix is to just order in. Chinese, Pizza, the diner up the street. But I wanted tonight to be different. There are only a couple of things that I think I cook well and one of them is Spaghetti Pie. I have to confess it's made in a crock pot. I can hear all of you "real" cooks, and queens sticking your noses in the air, but hey don't knock it if you haven't tried it. When finished it's somewhat like lasagna made with spaghetti and cooked in a crock pot instead of the oven.

I have to admit that I was somewhat nervous. For dinner it was going to be S.H., M.G., and C.Z. my roommate. All three full-blooded Italians. In fact C.Z.'s grandparents didn't move hear until they were teens. All four of them. As a side note all four of his grandparents were from the same village in Italy and knew each other as children. They met here, married here, etc. etc. So my pretend Italian had to be more than a little good.

The catch to cooking in a crock pot is the dish cooks all day, so I had to have it started by 11:00 to have dinner ready by 6:00. Everything was going fine until I realized I didn't have any eggs. I threw on shoes and ran across the street to the Pioneer Grocery store to get them. While I was there I also got the produce for the salad. I had meant to get to a store downtown for the produce yesterday but it didn't happen. The store across the street is scary. No one speaks English and the products they sell are questionable to say the least. I have seen customers picking through rotten vegetables to try and find anything usable. I got lucky today. Everything seemed okay. And in a flash I was back finishing up the recipe.

Once my "pie" was cooking. I decided it was nap time. C.Z. had left about an hour earlier and I was on my own. I turned on the TV. Discovered My Fair Lady was on, got comfortable and woke up as the movie was almost over. I should point out that it was well past the half way mark when I started so that you don't think I took a three hour nap. I got up and realized that I should get flowers for the table for dinner. Every corner in midtown and lower Manhattan has a deli with flowers but not in Washington Heights. If I wanted flowers I had to go downtown so I showered and headed downtown.

As I walked to the subway I realized that the day was beautiful and thought that I should incorporate a walk into my day. I haven't mentioned my weight in a while but for the past 7 weeks I have been trying to walk at least two miles a day, and have subsequently lost 19 pounds as of today. My usual walk is from 59th Street/Columbus Circle to 14th Street/Eighth Avenue. It's exactly two miles according to Mapquest, and it puts me in Chelsea/The Village to meet up with friends etc. So today as per my routine I got off the train at 59th Street and started walking south. I was making lists in my head as I walked. Do this, get that, don't forget this before my guests arrived, etc. It suddenly popped into my head that I didn't know where my cloth napkins were from the move. I know I have a couple of sets of them but I had no idea where. I called C.Z. to see if he had seen them or if he had any. He said no to both questions.

There was only one solution...buy more. As I was headed downtown there were a couple of options. Macy's, Bed Bath and Beyond, Williams Sonoma. I got to Macy's first, took a deep breath and plunged in. It was insane. Customers everywhere you looked. "Pretty" people dressed in black drowning in cologne. Strollers. Kids. AAAAAHHHHHH. What was I thinking. However, since I was already inside, I would hurry to the 8th floor to look for napkins. Hurry. Who was I kidding. The elevators were filled to capacity. And the escalators seem to puzzle most people. Each person would have to stop, concentrate and then jump on. At the top, they concentrate, jump off, and stop. It creates quite a traffic problem. The whole process is orchestrated by grumpy employees telling everyone to watch their step, keep the line moving, and have a happy holiday at the top of their lungs.

I get to the 8th Floor, step off the escalator, round the corner to discover I am in kid hell. OH, NO! Santa's on the 8th Floor. I can't move forward. I can't retreat. There are small people everywhere and no one seems to be moving. I finally push my way past a small family blocking the entire aisle and slowly proceed forward into Macy's toy section. The crowd has only gotten worse. Parent's are posing their children in front of things taking their pictures as if they have never been inside a department store before. I hold my breath and keep pushing forward. I am through. I continue moving following the signs for table linens. I walk, and walk, and walk. I don't see any. I turn and go back in the other direction. Still nothing. I turn and head back once again, confirming by the signs that I am going in the right direction. Still nothing. I spot two cashiers checking people out and I push my way up them and ask. "Where are your table linens." "On the six floor." FUCK!

I have to go back through Santa Land and Toy Land to get to the escalator. FUCK! Once again I take a deep breath and plunge in. It's slow going but I get there, go down two flights and still don't see any. I ask more quickly this time and am finally pointed in the right direction. I scout through them trying to decide what I want, what will work, what's not too expensive, and finally I choose. I get to the register where I am asked if I am from some place else. I reply, "Yes, I am from Washington Heights." The cashier laughs. She rings my purchases where I discover that everything I have chosen is on sale for much less. I pay, which is an event because I am at first told that my Bank Card is declined. I gasp. I just checked my balance yesterday and there was more than enough money in the bank. I only have 40 bucks in my pocket and I don't own a credit card. I insist there's a mistake and she runs it again. This time realizing it's a bank card. She make the adjustment, I entered my PIN number and suddenly everything is fine.

Now I have to make my escape, but first I have to pee. I have never seen a line so long for a men's restroom. I have only ever seen lines this long at the women's restrooms at the theatre. It takes almost 20 minutes to get through the line, but in NYC you go where you can go. I make my way back downstairs once again with people new to escalators and being yelled at to enjoy my holidays. Outside I take a deep breath, I am free. Whew.

I continue my walk down 7th Avenue toward 14th Street. I get to my deli and begin my selection of flowers. I had thought I would get red roses but the only ones they had were already arranged with baby's breath and that's not what I really wanted. I ended up going with red and white tulips which in the end I think were a better choice. I also wanted to get a poinsettia for the apartment. I am looking them over when I hear the man behind me ask if the poinsettia will last through the middle of the week. I turn to hear the exchange. The girl being asked the question doesn't understand, so he asks again. She says she doesn't know. At this point I turn and tell him that the poinsettia is a plant and will lasts as long as he cares for it. He doesn't get it. I explain again, it's not a cut flower, it's a plant, in dirt, that will live if cared for, indefinitely. Ahhhhh. Finally he gets it. He's very happy about this. For the next 15 minutes he tells me about his journey with the plants he's been caring for. I smile and give him what little advice I can. I finish paying, wish him a happy holiday and I am moving toward the train.

Finally an hour later than I expected to be, I am home. Luckily, as I was coming into my apartment S.H. called to let me know they were running late. I said no problem, as I had just gotten home, take your time and get here when you can. I set the table, arrange the flowers, make the salad, put the garlic bread in the oven and sit down to have a beer. Finally S.H. calls to say they are on their way. C.Z. and I light the candles, turn on the Christmas music and prepare for our guests.

This story is much longer than I realized it would be.

S.H. and M.G. arrived. They admired our tree, with M.G. inspecting each ornament wanting to know it's story. We chatted over drinks, while the bread finished warming. Finally the moment of truth was here. I served up dinner. We toasted and everyone was eating. They liked it. In fact all three of them admitted their surprise at liking it. They had all had doubts all day about what I was serving and were afraid they would hate it. In fact they all liked it so much everyone had seconds and M.G. had thirds. YAY! My white trash "Spaghetti Pie" was a hit. Over dinner we laughed, made fun of each other, gossipped and had a great time. After dinner we moved to the living room and continued our conversation while M.G. made trifle. He had thought it would be the perfect dessert for my dinner. I have to admit he was right. It was great.

M.G. and S.H. left around 11:00 and C.Z. and I cleaned up. After the dishes were done, we crashed in the living room, turned on Charlie Brown's Christmas and just relaxed. All in all it was a perfect day.

I love Christmas specials. I have been watching them for years. My all time favorite is Santa Claus Is Coming to Town. When I was young I would scan the TV Guide for weeks to find out when it was on to be sure not to miss it. I know every word to the Put One Foot In Front of Another song. I even bought the DVD last year to add it to my collection. I like all of the specials though and there is a fondness in my heart for all of them.

Needless to say I was excited when I discovered a couple of weeks ago that there was a live action version of The Year Without a Santa Claus being televised this year. I did my research, found out when it was on and made sure to have my roommate DVR it since I would still be in Maine. I finally got a chance to watch it last night.

In a word...

IT SUCKED!!!!

It was painful to watch. There was not one interesting thing about it. The script was bad. The acting was bad. The production design was bad. The direction was bad. Having it end was the only good thing about it. I felt like I was watching a small town's community theatre production of The Year Without a Santa Claus. To make matters worse it was two hours long with is about 60 minutes longer than a kids show should ever be. Especially one that doesn't have jokes built in for the adults. But wait it didn't stop there. As the icing on the cake...it was offensive. There was a guest appearance by "every one's favorite TV therapist" Dr. Laura. How did anyone think this was a good idea. If I remember correctly her TV show only lasted a second because of all the controversy. Really? How did anyone think this would be a good idea?

Tonight my roommate and I were watching TV and I mentioned that I had watched the show last night and how bad it was. He didn't believe me. How could John Goodman and Delta Burke not be funny? How could that be. It's a children's show. It had to have a few redeeming qualities. When the show we were watching ended he started the recording. Within 15 minutes my point was proven. Santa was grumpy and mean. The writing was boring, not engaging, and so far nothing had happened. He wanted it to end. I did recommend seeing the production number of the Heat Miser and Snow Miser so we fast forwarded. Even that was disappointing. The chorus for each of them were 4 scantily clad girls in heels doing their high school choreography from Guys and Dolls. Where were the people? To put it mildly even the song was bad.

So what's my point? I don't understand how this crap got made. Who would think it was a good idea to do this? The original is wonderful fun. I have watched it every year for decades. Why do we need to take something that was done well in the first place and make a mockery of it? I think of the money spent to do this show and can't help but wonder how many homeless people could have been fed. How much medication for the elderly could have been purchased. If they let me be in charge for 5 minutes the first thing I would do is fire the person who green-lighted this project.

Scotty over at The Other Side of Straight posts an annual list of his favorite things at Christmas. He wanted other bloggers to do the same so here is my list of favorite Christmas things.

* Waking up to find the ground covered in snow
* Napping on the couch when the temperature outside is freezing
* Searching for the perfect Christmas tree
* Unpacking my Christmas ornaments and remembering their significance
* Midnight candle light service at the one room church in the country on Christmas Eve
* Listening to carols as I decorate the tree
* My mom making Frosty Winter Bars
* Snowball fights
* Giving people Christmas gifts
* Hot apple cider with Captain Morgan Rum
* A dark room lit by white lights of the Christmas Tree and candles
* Waiting to the last minute to do my Christmas Shopping
* Watching all my favorite Christmas specials on T.V.
* Driving around to look at Christmas Lights
* Christmas breakfast at my mom's house
* Walking down 5th Avenue to look at the Christmas window displays
* Trying to figure out how to get my Christmas gifts home on the airplane
* How beautiful NYC is in newly fallen snow
* Getting Christmas cards
* Phone calls on Christmas day from my friends
* Playing Christmas songs on the piano

These are just a few of the many things that make me smile at during the Christmas season.
What are the things that make you smile?

Day Three in Portland.

I managed to set my alarm correctly for day three and was out of bed around 8:30. I stumbled downstairs to the kitchen for coffee. Everyone else was already up and we hung out in the living room chatting. We discussed the plan for the day.

First on our list. Brunch. I need to start paying better attention because I don't remember the name of the place we went for brunch. We started with coffee all around and then I ordered a breakfast scramble with eggs and broccoli. M.M. also ordered a Cinnamon French Toast for the table which was sort of like dessert at breakfast. The restaurant was packed and M.M. and L.M. knew at least half the people there. It took at least 30 minutes to leave the restaurant while they said goodbye to everyone.

Back in the car I requested that we stop at 7-11 for a Diet Coke, which annoys L.M. because she thinks I drink to much Diet Coke but she agreed to stop. We then headed north to look for Christmas ornaments. M.M. and L.M. don't have enough ornaments to decorate the tree and L.M. declared that she'd only use "used" ornaments on her tree. There was no way she was going to Target or Wal-Mart to buy boxes of glass ornaments. We drove for about 20 minutes when we found an antique store. We did a quick u-turn and began exploring. The store was my favorite kind of antique store. More junk than antiques. The kind of place that has treasures just waiting to be found. We spent about an hour in it looking for ornaments. L.M. found about 10 that she liked and then we were on to the next stop. Another two or three miles up the road we discovered another store. This one was a real find, not because of the contents but because of the man who owned it. He was a real character, with a beagle who did tricks for us the whole time we were there. Again L.M. found ornaments that she liked and we headed back to the car. It was decided that we had to get back to check on Max, L.M.'s dog so it was back to Portland.

On the way back I asked for another Diet Coke but L.M. was not being as generous this time. She drove past at least 10 fast food places without stopping making it very clear I wasn't getting one.

We dropped L.M. at home and M.M. and I ran back out to go the grocery and to the L.L. Bean store again in Portland. At L.L. Bean I found a couple of shirts and a pair of pants that fit and of course some more SmartWool socks. At the grocery store we got the makings for pasta for 8. For dinner two of M.M. and L.M.'s friends were coming over with their two small children and one of their brothers. L.M. wanted food that would be quick and easy. Back home everyone again gathered in the kitchen to watch L.M. cook and once again the beer and wine was flowing. It didn't take long for dinner to be ready and soon we were back at the dining room table.

Dinner was great. We cleaned up afterwards and everyone began winding down. On Sunday night we were all in bed by 10 p.m. It's the earliest I've been to be in ages. I'd love to say that I had trouble going to sleep that early but I didn't. I was asleep in no time and the next thing I knew it was time to get up and be off the airport.

Thus ended my trip to Portland. The only thing I didn't do was meet up with my blogger friend. I have to admit that I chickened out. I was worried about looking like an idiot or not having anything to talk about, or just being stupid, so I didn't call. If you are reading this I know I'm being foolish but it's how I was feeling. Maybe I'll do better next time.

Day two in Portland.

I set my alarm for 7:30 so that I could get up early and have coffee before we started our day. Unfortunately I set it for 7:30 p.m. not a.m. so I was awakened by M.M. knocking on the door of my bedroom. It was almost 10:00. So much for coffee before we left home.

I quickly showered and we were out the door. We had two goals for the day. Get a new coat for me and get a Christmas tree for M.M. and L.M. Our first stop of the day. The L.L. Bean Outlet store in Portland. We found parking and got out of the car. I took about 5 steps and the next thing I knew I was on my ass. I had stepped on a patch of ice and my feet were out from under me. Luckily I was more embarrassed than hurt. So I carefully got up and we headed to the store. We spent about 20 minutes there. They had no coats and nothing that really interested us.

We then hit the highway to head north to Freeport. It takes about 30 minutes so we were there in no time. Again we parked, and I carefully got out of the car and we started our shopping. First stop. The L.L. Been discount store. We looked at everything in my size in the store. We even found a coat but it was almost $300.00 and that was the marked down price. We thought perhaps looking elsewhere was a better idea. I did buy some SmartWool socks. I was told they are all the rage, that I would love them and that I would switch to only this type of sock. That claim might be an exaggeration but I do have to admit they are great socks.

Next we headed to the North Face Store. Their stuff is great but we didn't find anything I needed. Next was the L.L. Bean main store up the street. If you haven't been there it's huge and the place is insane. The store is open 24/7 365 days a year. I am curious as to who shops there at 3 a.m. Christmas Eve. But if you need last minute gifts you can always get them there. So we started searching for coats. It took a while to find them in my size but after some work we found 4 that I liked. So I planted myself in front of a mirror and began trying them on. And trying them on. And trying them on. I hate shopping and I hate deciding. I finally narrowed it down to two and decided to carry both of them around until it was time to check out. I found a couple of shirts and sweaters that I liked. I was forced to decide which jacket I wanted (I went with the red one) and we got in line to pay.

Next we were off the Timberland Outlet store. We discovered a gold mine. Nearly everything in the store was 50% off or more. I found a lightweight jacket that was normally 75 bucks marked down to 15. I found a couple of really butch shirts that I liked and OH NO! I found a coat that I liked. And it was $75 dollars less than the L.L. Bean coat. And it was warmer. And it was red like the other one. It took about 3 minutes to decide to get this coat. So we were off to check out. Downstairs we were looking at hats while we were in line and I heard this conversation.

Customer: Has it snowed here this year?

Cashier: (With a look of surprise) Yes, it snowed last night. Didn't you notice the ground was covered.

Customer: Reall? I didn't notice.

Cashier: You didn't notice the ground was covered in snow.

Customer: Oh, that. I thought it was there for effect, for decoration.

Cashier: (Look of total astonishment at the stupidity of the customer)

I have repeated this conversation about a million time since I heard it. I thought it was the funniest thing ever.

We paid, we returned to L.L. Bean got a refund for the jacket and then we were off. We checked a couple of other stores but didn't find anything. Finally it was time to head back to Portland. We got back, picked up L.M. and their friend Sheila, and went looking for Christmas trees. Of course we stopped at the first tree stand we came to. We found Christmas trees and cute boys. What a great combination. The stand was limited in it's tall tree selection but what it lacked in choice it made up for it in cute boyness. We looked at every tree in the lot. L.M. wanted to buy the first tree she saw but it was short and fat. I convinced her it should at least be shaped like a Christmas tree. So we kept looking. After about an hour in the COLD and SNOW we finally found one that L.M. liked and one that Sheila liked. Next we had to convince the two cute boys
(Did I mention they were cute, and brothers and cute) to tie the two trees to the top of the car. They had tied one tree before but never two. We convinced them it was kind of the same thing and it would be no problem. Finally the trees were on and it was off home.

At home we got the trees off the car in the stand and now it was time to make dinner. Lobster...and steak. By this time everyone was home and we all gathered in corners of the kitchen and watched L.M. cook. The wine and beer were flowing and the mood was perfect. It took about an hour and we moved to the dining room and began our meal. It was steak for me and lobster for everyone else. If you remember I discovered that I didn't like the lobster experience all that well back in the summer. We drank more, ate a lot, and laughed a lot. Every so often someone would give me a bit of lobster. It's not that I don't like the taste, it's that I don't like the fact they were crawling around on the kitchen counter about 60 minutes earlier. When everyone was filled to capacity, we moved to the living room taking our beer and wine with us.













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We were sitting there whn L.M. and M.M. remembered they were invited to a party. We debated going for about 5 minutes, it was decided we had to go and off we went. Sheila drove since she hadn't been drinking and the 6 of us piled into the Volvo station wagon (What else would lesbians in Maine drive?). I should point out that M.M. was in the back. We drove the 10 blocks or so found parking and all got out. We were almost to the apartment when all of us realized we had never let M.M. out of the car. Whoops. When we got back to let her out of the car she was PISSED. I don't know if she was playing pissed, or really was. It didn't really matter none of us could stop laughing about it. We arrived at the party. It was LESBIANS. All Lesbians. All day. We said our hellos and headed to the kitchen for beer. Christie, Kelly and I found a place in the corner and except to get more beer we hid there. It was actually quite fun and we were glad we went.

Finally it was time to go home, and we all piled back in the car. Drove the 10 blocks home. Got out, remembering to let M.M. out of the car. Got inside and collapsed in the living room. We all sat there for about 30 minutes and then said our good nights and went to bed.

Day three tomorrow.

Pic #1: Cute boy showing us a tree.
Pic #2: Sunset at the tree lot.
Pic #3: Lobsters on the counter having sex.
Pic #4: Lobsters being punished for having sex before marriage.
Pic #5: Lobster funeral.

My trip to Portland was wonderful. It snowed on Thursday night/Friday morning so the ground was covered in white when I arrived. It's the first snow I have seen in three years so to say I was excited is an understatement. It was also very cold, and although I have been looking forward to the cold weather it could have waited until I had my new winter coat. I was wearing a sweatshirt, so I didn't stay out to play long, I grabbed my bags, ran to the car and headed to my friend M.M.'s house. I got there only to find out their friends who were supposed to meet me there weren't home yet. So I was left standing on their porch waiting. Luckily I didn't have to wait long but it was still long enough to be cold.

Friday night we had dinner down the street at a restaurant I fail to remember the name of. It was great though. Wine and beer before dinner. A nice french onion soup for an appetizer. And the world largest pork chop for dinner. Of course the best of all was the company. M.M. and her girlfriend L.M. and their two friends Christie and Kelly. We had a great time, laughed a lot and enjoyed the evening.

After dinner we walked the two or three blocks back home where we crashed in the living room. We hung out and talked about mostly nothing. NYC, Chicago, Portland. Our jobs, etc. Around 11:00 it was decided that it was time for bed. It was also determined that my bedroom in the back of the house, in the unheated part would be too cold for me so I was put in M.M. and L.M.'s room and they were going to be on the sofa. This worked out great because both of them are early risers and this meant that I could sleep late.

That's it for day one. I fill in day's two and three tomorrow.

These are the states that I have visited in my life. It's not too shabby. I still need to get to the North/Northwest though.

Anybody know how to shrink this so it fits on the text side of my blog?

Here are some pictures of the finished tree along with pictures of some of my favorite ornaments.













The ornament to the left is a Santa Claus Tree Topper that was on my family tree while I was growing up. He now gets stuffed on the tree in a bare spot. But he always has to be there.














This ornament was made for me by my fraternity's house mom Ms. T. She was very handy and was legendary for her sausage balls and biscuits and ham. If she thought you were having a bad day she'd always whip up something tasty. One year she made a bunch of these crocheted ornaments for me because she knew how much I loved Christmas.












This doll was given to me years ago as a "funny" Christmas gift. She got placed on the tree that year and has since found a permanent place on my tree. She also gets stuffed into an open place.















This paper ornament was made by me when I was in 2nd Grade. I have three or four of these and have treasured them as an adult. They always go on my tree and are never hidden in the back but are up front and center. My teacher in 2nd grade was named Ms. Manning and I loved her dearly. I was devasted when she got married at the end of my year with her. She became Mrs. Smith and moved away a year later. I have no idea where she went or what became of her, but she was a huge influence on me as a child.









When I was in elementary school my mom bought a box of wooden ornaments that came in a sheet. You punched them out of the wood and then painted them yourself. Years ago I raided my parents Christmas ornaments and took several of these. They are now favorites of mine because my mother painted them and they are almost as old as me. I have seen the same ornaments on several trees throughout the years.










This ornament was bought by S.G. and me for our first Christmas together. We bought a pair of them and they were the first of many really nice ornaments we purchased together. On December 26th we were always at the nicest department stores, florists, etc. to pick up their after Christmast discounts on their ornaments. I still have most of these, although about 10 years ago I did break down and let S.G. come to my house and choose a few of the ones we bought together to have for himself.









This is my most gay ornament. It's a mirror ball that spins. It took C.Z. and I about 20 minutes to find a place for it on the tree. It had to be up front and center and had to have a place to hang so that it could spin freely. I realized as I wrote the words "most gay" that in fact the whole tree is pretty gay, but what's a girl to do?












This is my blown glass pig ornament. I was once involved with a guy who was a bit of a pig...in only the nicest way possible. So I began buying him pig ornament every year. This one was bought for him but for what ever reason I kept it. It's a pink Santa Pig. How gay?

The tree is up and decorated. It looks great. My roommate is beside himself. He told me today that it's the first tree's he's put up since 1990. He just kept stepping back from it saying it's so beautiful, it's so beautiful. It was great pulling my ornaments out as we began putting decorations on the tree. I haven't had them out of the box since 2001 and I'd forgotten about many of them. I'd open a box and immediately get excited as I began to take them out and put them on the tree. The hardest part of the evening was deciding what ornaments to leave off the tree. I have enough ornaments to decorate two trees one of which is usually 10 or so feet tall. This is year I am putting up one tree that's about 7'6" tall. All of the nice ornaments made it on, and we ended up just leaving off the glass balls. We finished up by putting "icicles" on the tree. According to C.Z. he's never had a tree that didn't have them. In fact he had this very specific system of how to approach putting them on the tree, so much so that I stopped helping and ate dinner. It took almost as long for him to finish this task as it did to decorate the whole tree. It's finished though, and it looks great and I'll have pictures in the next day or so.

I've had a great day today. I slept late. No surprise there. I didn't get to bed until around 3:00 a.m. Got up and returned phone calls that I owed people from last week. One of those calls was to M.G. the director of my show. I wanted to find out if I did anything I needed to apologize for last Friday night when I was drunk. Did I mention that I got way more than a little tipsy on Friday. I don't remember all of the evening. Therefore, I wanted to make sure I didn't do anything to embarrass myself. He said I did not. Just that I was drunk. Whew, that's good.

I showered and headed downtown to run some errands. I started at K-mart. I wanted to pick up a couple of extra sets of white christmas tree lights. It's been five years since I used mine so I assumed that there would be a couple sets that didn't work. Then I was off to Macy's. There's nothing worse than having to go to Macy's during the holidays. Between the tourists who act as if they have never been in a department store before and the actual customers shopping, it's a zoo to say the least. I went there to look for a Christmas stocking for my roommate. I believe everyone should have a stocking if you are decorating for Christmast and I didn't think C.Z. would have one, so I made it my responsibility to correct that.

When I finally got to the 9th floor, the zoo was intensified. Seemed everyone was shopping for X-mas decorations today. I found a stocking I thought he would like and then decided to get him an ornament in honor of our first Christmas together. I wanted to have one that said "Our First Christmas, 2006" but couldn't find one. I asked if they had any but the sales help looked at me as if I was crazy. They pointed me in the direction of the Baby's First Christmas. Ugh! I finally decided on a Christmas 2006 ornament with Santa on it and headed for the line. I stood in line for almost 30 minutes before I could give them my money and get the hell out of there.

From there, I headed to 14th Street to see my psychiatrist. I see him once a month and today was the day. It went well. I always like seeing him and today was even better than normal. He seemed to think that I was doing okay. None of my meds needed to be adjusted and life was good.

From his office I wandered back to the subway, where I just missed the train. I have yet to understand why people walking down the stairs to the train go as slow as possible completely blocking the stairs when it's not their train. I tried to get around said couple but of course their defense was better than my offense. It didn't help that the train was smashed full and I decided it wasn't worth trying to push my way on. Ah, but what a day. In less than two minutes another A train arrived and because it was so close behind the last one, it was empty all the way to my house. Yippee.

Of course the only real bad part of my day occurred once I arrived home. My job tonight was to put the lights on the Christmas tree. I had pulled out all of the boxes of decorations today and put them in the living room so that I'd be ready when I got home. My friend M.M. called just as I was opening the door and as I talked to her I began opening the boxes looking for the lights. I opened the first box, and then another, and another, and another. Soon all the boxes were open and there were no lights. How could that be. I own at least 30 strands of white christmas tree lights. I have a box dedicated to just those. Where could they be. I searched and searched to no avail. They could not be found. I have no idea where they are but they aren't in my apartment.

Now I was in a dilemma. I had to put lights on the tree so C.Z and I could decorate it tomorrow night, but I have no lights. Then an idea occurred. There's a Target store only 3 stops north of me in the Bronx. Perhaps it stayed open late. I looked the store up and in fact they were open until 11:00. I could make it. So I threw my clothes back on and ran to the train. Or rather shivered to the train. It's cold here tonight. Got to Target to find the worst selection of Christmas lights ever. I have never seen products so picked over. In took almost 30 minutes of searching through every pile of lights they had to piece together 10 boxes of different brands of white Christmas lights. I found my way back to the store, paid and was back on the subway. In all it took 75 minutes to get there and back. Not bad for NYC.

And so, the day is over. I gave my roommate his gifts. We watched Studio 60 together. He went to bed and I put the lights on the tree. All in all it's been a wonderful day. Here's a couple of pictures of the tree. It will look better tomorrow when it's finished. Now I must take my leave so that I don't sleep until 2:00 p.m. again tomorrow.

Sometimes I wonder how I manage to still be awake at 1:30 a.m. I don't set out to stay up late. In fact I tell myself that I am going to get to bed early but very rarely does that actually happen. I decide to check my email, and then read a couple of blogs and then I should probably do a post and the next thing you know it's the wee hours of the morning and I'm not in bed. The only real problem with this is that I sleep till the afternoon and thus never get anything done during the day that needs to be done during the day. Little things like laundry, cleaning, running errands. Each day I say tomorrow will be different, but if I don't get 8 hours of sleep I am miserable the next day. And thus it's one endless cycle.

Enough whining. My roommate and I bought our Christmas tree today. It's actually the smallest tree I have ever had, but it fits nicely in our apartment without eating the whole room so it's great. The only real disappointment is that it's not a fraser fir. They are my favorite type of Christmas tree and it's what I have always bought. Unfortunately the lot near our house was out of them and it's too much work to try and cart a tree home from too far away. Fraser firs are also more expensive so I didn't mind saving the money. I'll take pictures tomorrow and show you before and after. I am actually excited about having a tree. It's the first time I have had a tree since 2001 and it's the first time I have ever had a roommate that actually wanted to participate in the tree experience.

I know, meme's are the easy way out, but I'm tired and hungover. I'll do a real post tomorrow.

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?

Hot Chocolate


2. Did you ever do anything for Santa?

Always as a child.


3. Colored lights on tree/house or white?

White and only white. Colored lights do not show off the beauty of the ornaments on the tree.


4. Do you hang mistletoe?

I have, but no in a long while. But it's fun to have around.


5. When do you put your decorations up?

I like to put them up the weekend after Thanksgiving. My roommate and I are putting our tree up tomorrow.


6. What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)?

We do sandwichs on Christmas Eve with desserts and I LOVE my mom's chicken salad.


7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child:

The year I got my purple bicycle. It was hidden on our back porch and my parents sent me out there two or three times before I saw it.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?

I was around 7.


9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?

As kids we always got to open one gift on Chrismas Eve. I always chose the one I thought would be the least exciting so that I could save the good ones for the next morning.


10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree?

Get the tree, let it fall. Then spend a couple of hours putting lights on the tree always using the squint test to make sure there are no holes in the lights and then I spend forever putting on the decorations. I haven't put up a tree since 2001 so I am really excited about having one.


11. Snow! Love it or Dread it.

I love it. That's why I am so excited to not be living in San Diego.

12. Can you ice skate?

NOOOOOOO!


13. Do you remember your favorite gift?

I have never really gotten things that were out of the ordinary. I remember an assortment of small things but not anything important.


14. What's the most exciting thing about the holidays for you?

Putting up the tree.


15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert?

My ex-boyfriend's mom made a dessert called Frosty Winter Bars. They are delicious. My mom started making them several years ago and they are now everyone's favorite.


16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?

Christmas eve midnight church service at this little country church about 10 miles out of town. The whole church seats about 150 people and it's lit by candles and it's very serene. The service is always the same and is the telling of the Christmas story through Christmas hymn. I started doing this about 10 or so years ago and have been doing ever since. The last several years I have gone by myself, but it's something I enjoy.


17. What tops your tree?

A Bow that my boyfriend S.G. and I bought years ago.


18. Which do you prefer give or receive gifts?

I prefer to give gifts. I am a very good present person. About 95% of the time I know whether someone will like the present they are getting or not.

19. What is your favorite Christmas Song?

All time favorite song is Do You Hear What I Hear. But my favorite recorded song is Little Drummer Boy with David Bowie and Bing Crosby. It's beautiful

20. Candy Canes?

By all means yes.

21. Favorite Christmas TV Special?

Santa Claus is Coming to Town. I love the Put One Foot in front of another song. I watch it every year without fail

I saw this a couple of day ago on Sorted's blog and since I'm a little short on time tonight and it's late I thought I would steal it.

A is for age: 41
B is for beer of choice: Corona
C is for career: Lighting Designer
D is for favorite Drink: DIET COKE...You can never have enough
E is for essential item you use everyday: Toothbrush, computer
F is for favorite song at the moment: Leader of the Pack....it's in the show I am designing
G is for favorite games: Monopoly.
H is for hometown: Georgetown, Kentucky
I is for instruments you play: Piano
J is for favorite juice: Apple
K is for kids: No, and although I like them, I don't want them. I don't think I'd make a good parent and I figure there are enough kids in the world without me needing one.
L is for last kiss: C.T. my ex-boyfriend, but it wasn't romantic
M is for marriage: No, D.L.C. broke up with me about 2 years ago and I haven't dated seriously since then.
N is for name of your best friend: Michelle. She and I have been best friends since the mid-90's. We have been through break ups together, illnesses, and lot's of laughs. We have also been on 4 long vacations together that were near perfect.
O is for overnight hospital stays: On December 20, 2003 my appendix burst and I was in the hospital for 8 days. It was not fun.
P is for phobias: Snakes
Q is for quote: Hypocrisy is the Vaseline of social intercourse.
R is for biggest regret: Not having sex with S.C. in 1987 when I found him in my bed in our f fraternity house. Not treating S.G. better and letting him get a way. Not finishing my M.F.A. earlier. That being said I realize that every person is on a different path, so I truly believe my life is the way it's supposed to be for a reason.
S is for self confidence: Not really, but if in anything it's in my career choice.
T is for time you wake up: as late as possible. I'd sleep until 2pm if I could.
U is for underwear: Boxers since I got fat. Boxer briefs before that.
V is for vegetable you love: Corn, peas, carrots
W is for worst habit: I snore, but I don't know if that's a habit. I think Diet Coke is my worst habit. I have to have it available at all times or I get anxious. What's that about?
X is for x-rays you have had: teeth
Y is for yummy food you make: Spaghetti pie, don't ask, but it's delicious.
Z is for zodiac sign: Aries

I have been in tech all week for a show that I am designing in Queens. For those non-theatre people out there, tech is when all the design elements of a show are introduced for the first time, rehearsed and implemented. As a lighting designer this is when most of my actual work is done. A couple of weeks earlier I designed on paper where all the lights would hang and sent the drawings off to the theatre. The theatre crew then hangs the lights above the stage where I have specified they should be hung. I go in two or three days before the "tech rehearsals" start and focus, which involves standing on the stage and having my crew point the lights where I want them.

At this point I am ready to go. Tech rehearsals begin and in a perfect world, we start at the first moment of the show and walk through it moment by moment, setting levels and recording changes in the computer. For a lighting designer this is a very stressful time. Everyone is waiting for you, so that we can move forward and yet you need time to actually make the scene look the way you envisioned it. It's very much a hurry up, hurry up, hurry up kind of situation that's not for the faint at heart. With any luck your ideas match what the director has pictured for the show and tech goes smoothly. Sometimes, it goes the other way and the director hates everything you do and you have to start thinking on your feet and making changes to your design. Once again all of this is done while everyone watches, waiting to move forward.

This is the game I have been playing all week. And this week has not been fun. The theatre's crew has the combined IQ of a goldfish. I watched on Monday as the TD took 90 minutes to run power to 10 lights. The entire job should have taken 15 minutes and that would have included stopping to smoke a cigarette. I ask the crew person assigned to the show to re-circuit a set of lights this morning when I got to the theatre. As of 7:00 when I left she was still trying to figure out what I was talking about. The same crew member moved the lighting computer today to it's show position but failed to run the cable that connected it to the lighting equipment. When we were ready to start the show, she couldn't figure out why the lights wouldn't come on. These are just a few of the things that have happened this week.

As for the director, he's on my last fucking nerve. At one point today it took every ounce of control to not snap his head off his little body and shove it up his ass. I know Ur-Spo I should probably look at my issues with anger...but it's how I felt today. Yesterday, he asked that we add a series of Christmas lights to a platform. (Yes, it's a bit high schoolish, but what can you do.) These lights were to be used with theatre lights that were all ready in place to create an effect. When I got to the theatre this morning, the TD had installed the lights and wired them as a part of the other Christmas lights in the show. I explained to him that this was a different idea and they needed to be changed. Surprisingly, without much difficulty, he made the change and we were ready to go. Enter the director. He proceeds to tell me that in fact he has changed his mind and the lights do in fact need to be wired with the other Christmas lights to be one unified idea. Now, I agree with the change, I just wished he had told me 30 minutes earlier. But wait it doesn't end there. I explained to him, that in fact the work was already done the way he had requested it, and although it could be changed it couldn't happen till tomorrow. He said okay and we started rehearsal. Two minutes into the scene he stops and wants to know why the lights are not on together. I once again explain the problem and we move on. Two hours later he runs over during a musical number to explain to me that these lights are supposed to be on. Once again I explain the situation and we move on. At the end of the rehearsal, we gather for notes and the first note he gives me, is that the lights should come on together not with the other lights. Yet ONCE AGAIN, I explain the situation and we move forward. At 3:30 we start an invited dress. 20 minutes into Act 1, he scurries over to me to ask why the lights are on in this scene. I ONCE AGAIN, explain the situation. 20 minutes later he scurries over once again to find out why the lights aren't on. I ONCE AGAIN explain the situation. At intermission, he stops me as I go to check in with the stage manager and he ONCE AGAIN questions the lights and why they aren't working properly. It was at this point that I had had it. I grunted out the explanation yet ONCE AGAIN and swore to myself that if he asked again I would kill him. He didn't mention it again until the end of the show during notes. I started to explain it to him and stopped myself and said, "You know, you don't really need to know what's going on, just trust me when I say it'll be fixed by tomorrow."

All day long it was if I was speaking Japanese. He didn't seem to listen or understand a word that I was saying. I know that sometimes things get a little technical for some people but this really wasn't that technical. And he's the one who requested the lights, requested they be wired the way they were and then changed his mind. By the time I left I was so pissed off and angry that I could scream. Luckily the subway ride home is 90 munutes so I had plenty of time to calm down and become a normal person again.

Now I am home and my roommate and I are both on our laptops in the living room. He bought me the new Bette Midler Christmas CD today so we turned off the TV and listened to it. It's so peaceful and nice, just sitting here listening to the music. It just ended and I searched through our combined collection and now the CD player is randomly playing Christmas music for us. Ah, it's nice to be home.

Sorry about the lack of posts. My ex-boyfriend C.T. was in town this weekend and I spent three days entertaining him. I think I walked about a million miles while he was here. In fact there is a blister on my right foot the size of a grapefruit. It was nice having him visit but I didn't have a single free minute to myself to even think about a post.

He got in late on Friday evening. He dropped his things off at my apartment and we took the subway downtown to get food. He was anxious to see at least a few of the sights and the only food around me is delivery, so off to Chelsea and the world of gay boys we went. We got there around 11:15 so ended up eating at The Dish. Which is diner food in a word. But the waiters are cute for the most part and the food is cheap and it's not too bad. So we sat in the front window and watched the world go by and had dinner.

After dinner we headed north toward Times Square. It's never a good time to go to Times Square but going after the rush definitely beats being there in the middle of the day. So we walked over to 7th Avenue so that we could see Times Square expand before our eyes. It also allowed us to the see the Empire State Building as we walked past 34th Street. By the time we got to 42nd Street the crowds weren't so bad. We wandered around for a little while and actually ended up going in the sheet music store. C.T. looked for the sheet music to Funny Girl while I strolled up and down aisles and wished that I could have my piano again. At 1:00 a.m. they kicked us out of the store and we walked to Columbus Circle and took the subway home.

It was almost 2:30 before we were home and close to 3:00 before we were in bed. C.T. slept with me so that it wouldn't be as much of an imposition on C.Z. my roommate. Before you go there...we slept together. That's it. We did talk until the wee hours of the morning. Which was rather unfortunate since C.T. was up at 7:30 ready to see the rest of the city.

By 9:00 we were out the door for Saturday's adventure. We did the tour of midtown. We checked out 5th Avenue including FAO Schwartz, the Apple Store, and all the windows displayed going south. We went through St. Patrick's Cathedral, then over to Rockefeller Center to see the undecorated tree, and then on to the Main Branch of the Public Library. Then it was east to Grand Central Station then back to Times Square to see Altar Boys. (Which is a lot of fun.) After the show we headed downtown to Chelsea and the Village where we looked around until dinner at 8:00. Originally we were going to eat at Tello's. But they couldn't decide how much longer it would be for a table. The told us 5 minutes when we arrived. 30 minutes later we were still waiting. At 45 minutes we told them, "sorry we are going elsewhere. We ended up at Lasagna, another Italian restaurant up the street. It was actually okay. The food was good, it was reasonably priced and the bartender and waiter were both very pretty. We managed to be home by 11:00.

C.T. and I decided we needed to unwind so we watched the movie Jeffrey, which is funnier than I remembered. At 2:30 we were in bed where we chatted until at least 4:00. Which was really unfortunate Saturday night because once again he was awake at 7:30 ready to explore the city. I finally woke up enough to tell him that if I didn't get some sleep I wasn't leaving the apartment, gave him directions to Starbucks on 181 Street and told him to come back in a couple of hours. I slept until he rang the buzzer to get back in. After a quick shower, we were on our way again.

Sunday was devoted to the Financial District. In too few hours we rode the Staten Island Ferry, saw Ground Zero, checked out both Trinity Church and St. Paul's, had coffee at South Street Seaport, took pictures at Wall Street, walked half the Brooklyn Bridge, had coffee in Tribeca, C.T. had coffee in Soho. Walked on up to the Village where we explored what's left of Christopher Street. Pointed out the Stonewall Bar. And at 7:30 were on the subway headed back home.

At home C.T., C.Z. and I ordered Chinese and popped in the movie Torch Song Trilogy. C.T. had never seen it and I love it. I saw it when it was first released and cried like a baby when Matthew Broderick was killed. After T.S.T. C.T. wanted to watch another movie and since his weekend had been all NYC. He wanted it to be filmed in New York. So he chose Godspell. I half watched it while I read a few blogs and started getting ready for bed. By 1:00 we were in bed. I had to be up early Monday morning because I'm doing a show in Queens. C.T. and I rode downtown together and he was on his own for the day.

Now the moral of the story. I love having visitors. I love showing people around the city who have never been here before. I love sharing the little pieces of trivia that I have and explaining how the subways work, how to hail a cab, and tons of other NYC information. What I don't like is being responsible for the planning of the entire event. C.T. did not actively participate in the planning of his day, was not interested in any NYC history and had no opinion on where to go next, what to eat for lunch, or what he wanted to do. By 5:00 p.m. on Sunday I was miserable. I had taken him every place I could think of, and couldn't for the life of me, get him to tell me what he wanted to do next. He didn't want to see a movie. He didn't want to eat. He didn't want to.... After a couple hours of this I made the decision that home was the best place to be and that we were ordering Chinese for dinner.

After a long talk with my roommate I have decided that never again will I be responsible for planning someone's trip to NYC. I'll be happy to show them around and be a part of the experience. But it will be up to them to decide what they want to do. I love C.T. to death, but by the end of Sunday I was ready to scream and just wanted him to go home. Which was not his intent at all, but was where he pushed me to. I know he had a good time but before he comes to visit again, I'll have to explain the new rules to him.

So if any of you are planning trips to NYC and want me to show you around at least offer a few ideas about what you want to see.