Three anxiety attacks now in less than a week. I had another one tonight. This one wasn't as severe but it lasted longer. I was feeling the symptoms for about 3 hours. I finally took the subway home and by the time I got here it was almost gone. These things are not fun. I feel like I am about to jump out of my skin and sitting still is next to impossible. I did see my doctor today and he's increased my anti-depressant medication and gave me a small prescription of Ativan to help for the more serious attacks. I am hoping to not have to use it. What I have read on line about the drug makes it sound serious and I am not sure that it's what I want. Of course I say that now. Another intense attack like last Friday and I'll pop the whole bottle. But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Halloween is gone in the city. It's amazing how fast the signs of it disappeared. I ran errands most of the morning and I didn't see a single pumpkin, ghost, sign...anything. Of course, everywhere I looked was Christmas, Christmas, Christmas. But since it's after Halloween and Thanksgiving doesn't count I guess that's okay. I'm actually a little excited about Christmas this year. My roommate C.Z. and I have already discussed putting up a tree. We are both for it. I don't know how big it will be but I do know my decorations haven't been out of the box since 2001 and the prospect of a tree excites me. When it happens of course I'll post pictures.