It's amazing to me how I can fill my days with absolutely nothing and still not have time to take out the garbage. Even worse is how tired I am from doing nothing all day. I graduated from grad school on March 25th. Yes, it was a wonderful day and I had worked my ass off in the days leading up to graduation with writing my thesis, presenting, and defending it. It took hours of work and tons of money to get that little piece of paper with my name on it followed by the three little letters M.F.A.

And that's when the hard work stopped. For the last two and a half months my schedule has been mostly my own. I have done a couple of small shows, presented my portfolio in conferences on the east and west coast and well that's about it. I manage to do nothing most days quite successfully without even trying.

Take today for example. I didn't get to bed last night (or should I say this morning) until 5 a.m. It's not like I was doing anything constructive or even destructive for that matter. In the past few days I have discovered YouTube.com. I'd love to say that I discovered it myself. But the truth is, I happened upon a blog (sorry I don't remember its URL) but on it were posted daily Tony Award video clips from YouTube. When I discovered there were hundreds if not thousands of clips from Broadway shows on YouTube how could I not explore. Long story short, at 5 this morning I tore myself away from my computer and went to bed. I finally dragged my lazy ass out of bed at 1:30 after running two marathons in my sleep. This is no joke. I dreamed I ran two races. In the first I did extremely well, the second I was too tired to keep up.

Once I got out of bed. I managed to move to my computer where I cruised the internet looking at more video clips, blogs, the news, etc. until almost 4:30. I then grabbed a quick shower, and raced off to meet my friend C.D. and his fiancee E.M. for dinner. That lasted about two hours and was followed by a little trip to a place my friend T.M. and I call the "Watering Hole". It's actually an adult bookstore with a "theatre" that's a little on the dark side where consenting adults (mostly men) can gather to discuss sports and the weather. After a couple of hours cruising there, I decided to see a legitimate movie, The Breakup. And that brings me to present.

And dammit, I am exhausted. If it weren't for the fact that Jon Stewart comes on in ten minutes, I would already be on my way to bed. I have to get plenty of rest so I can do the same thing tomorrow. I keep telling myself tomorrow will be the day I get back on the horse and start getting work done. Then I sleep late, and well it's just too late in the day to be productive so I put it off for one more day. Of course all of this will change once I get to NYC because I'll be busy looking for work, pounding the pavement trying to get someone to hire me either as a designer or an assistant. The problem is I need to prep for that work. I need to get my resumes updated. New business cards printed. My website cleaned up.

Aw, how do I break out of this cycle? How do I turn over a new leaf and begin being productive again. Tune in tomorrow, same Bat Time, same Bat Channel, and I let you know what conclusions I have come to.

In the meantime, it's time for a Diet Coke (caffeine-free) and Jon Stewart.